A side note to begin with: Life tends to rub our noses into topics which we should address – we just often choose to ignore those valuable hints. I am trying to follow this bits of intuition and inspiration more and more, leading also to a new mixture of topics on this blog.
As life has brought up the topic of taboos and menstruation, I want to share some thoughts about them. Firstly, there are many ‘taboo’ topics even in ‘modern’ societies, many of which are related to the human body, reproduction of humanity and/or experiences made by women* and female-bodied people, especially those who are/were menstruating. Those topics include e.g. sex, sexual orientation and practices incl. sex work, certain diseases, implications of giving birth and care giving, breastfeeding, problems with fertility (both male and female), and menstruation – to name some elephants in the room. Secondly, while all these topics are highly relevant and need to be addressed broadly in society for several reasons, there are also multiple reasons for why they are not talked about. Those reasons need to be dissolved over time.
I will focus here on menstruation as it is kind of exemplary in my opinion. I am certainly not an expert in this topic, so feel free to correct my point of view.
I think that many of these topics are (still) in the taboo zone because they are to some extent more relevant to women* and female-bodied people and as we know many female experiences are ignored and even supressed in patriarchical and male-dominated societies (i.e. the vast majority of societies in the world currently). Historically, I think that this has a lot to do with suppressing women wherever possible and keeping control and power in men’s hands. (Not saying that all men did/do this on purpose, but many surely did/do it intentionally). It’s way easier to tie women to the house (see the ‘children, kitchen and church’ slogans), when their experiences are ostracized. When you are ashamed of bleeding – and might not even have utensils for periods – you are bound to the house and can’t work, demonstrate, engage, etc. Those topics might be intimate – yes – but it’s not necessary to have them charged with so much shame, suppression and silence. It is similar to that powerful men in the Dark Ages felt threatened by the knowledge, wisdom and independence of many female healers knowing a lot about the power of plants and rituals, as one of the reasons leading to witch hunts. As in former times, religion – e.g. in strict Catholic faith – still often puts shame and pressure on women, for example when it comes to banning contraception.
Not only for power dynamics and bringing us and the planet back in sync, we need to lift these taboos – it’s about health, inclusivity, prosperity and well-being as well. By the way, in more nature-connected and indigenous communities, menstruating was neither intimate nor a taboo in this way as it is a natural part of life and nature – and by the way relevant for half the population (!). They are/were so connected to each other and nature, that they use(d) to menstruate all at the same time, roughly according to the moon cycles. We are very far from this in our technical, thinking and detached ‘modern’ world.
But not only most men were and are intentionally and unintentionally avoiding or surpressing these topics. Women have come to be detached from their own bodies (also due to collective and individual trauma) and/or ashamed of bleeding – though again it’s perfectly normal and natural and if it were a male thing it wouldn’t be such a taboo, I am rather sure. We also like to ignore menstruation and the other mentioned topics ourselves and we tend to speak very little about it, even amongst each other. That’s not helpful either. Girls should learn early on that menstruation is something great – for example, without it we would not even be able to have kids – and should be properly introduced to all these topics with pride.
From my own experience in the last months, it was strangely easier for me to talk about menstruation with (open-minded and empathetic) men than with many women – they were interested, supportive and not intrinsically ashamed as many women still seem to be. When I started to talk more about it with people from all genders, the knot started to loosen and somehow other related (tabooized) topics can be much more easily addressed now as well, leading to deeper connections and healing within oneself and all kinds of groups and relationships. You can make it easier for others making the first step and talking about your own experience and struggles. When you are showing your vulnerability (of course with well-meaning people, especially at first), it opens the room for ohers to show themselves as well.
There is even something called ‘period poverty’ which implies that you cannot afford period products – as period products are costly and women usually have less money in general. Some countries have (finally) started to reduce taxes on such products or made them freely available (in public spaces) like Scotland does. I defintely support this for public spaces and ’emergency cases’ i.e. when you surprisingly start bleeding while not at home. For at home, I would rather recommend you to at least inform yourself about non-disposable period products (not only for the environment’s sake) because they help you to get a better connection to your own body and they are largely healthier. You can find an old post of mine on this here (I am not rewriting this post now though one link as expired and you will obviously see that I see at least the disclaimer differently now) and lots of helpful information on this online and in women news portals.
This is also an example of why we need to think about sustainability and regeneration in all areas of life and way sustainability practices mostly have several benefits. Reusable period products are healthier and more sustainable and create social benefits as well – like cycling and walking vs. car use, eating fresh, organic produce vs. convenience food, buying more qualitative products and repairing them vs. buying trash products. Those practices are also less costly in the long run – a hurdle can be the starting investment in reusable period (and other quality) products though. There should also be public support programs for this. Maybe communities can gift them to girls as a starter package in teenage years in the future or teach to sew them by themselves – there are great projects on this e.g. in India. Let’s all be creative here together and support each other! [Especially in poor places, there needs to be an improvement in water supply and safe sanitary private and public facilities and hygiene measures in general for healthy menstruation. This goes far beyond the topic covered here, though.]
I could say a lot more on this topic, but it’s already a long post. I hope you can take something out of it and gain some courage to take menstruation and other topics out of the taboo zone. Let me know what you think!
What you can do – a short summary:
- SPEAK ABOUT THESE TOPICS – in private conversations but also publicly
- Educate girls and women globally on all implications of the topic, and men as well
- Be open to learn and deal with menstruation, in theoretical and very practical terms
- Be proud of your own menstruation and cycle – if you have one – and support menstruating people – if you don’t have it (ever/not yet/not anymore)
- Question common narratives and taboos
- Provide free period products in your institution
PD: There are great ways to have a more natural cycle and bleeding does not need to hurt. Check out helpful yoga and relaxation practices, which teas help and take your resting time especially in the first days of bleeding. There even is a practice called hormonal yoga which can help to get a regular period and/or reduce negative symptoms when the menopause starts. I have several sources for my thoughts here, many are not that easy to be shared. In German, there is a book by Hannah Pehlgrimm which might be a good start. Contact me if you want to have help with finding further information. Take care of yourself and your needs!
source of header image: Bild von Gerd Altmann auf Pixabay
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